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Please share your best racing heckles!!!!

12K views 37 replies 33 participants last post by  1speedbrian 
#1 ·
Some of the best Cx racing fun and memories are spectator heckles...now that US Natz 2010 are done, please share some of your best heckles to expand our repertoire in anticipation for next season :)
 
#27 ·
TWB8s said:
A friend hit me with this one this season...

"You're riding like you're going for a coffee!"
Heh heh- yeah, I heard a variation of that at the first Crusade race this year;
"Gentlemen- this is a RACE - NOT A LATTE' RUN !!!"
 
#31 ·
Magdaddy said:
lots and lots of orange...jokingly call myself Great Pumpkin Racing. A buddy called me that years ago in a destination race we were doing. I crashed on a loose downhill, really rung my bell, but no damage to either me or the bike. It took a few minutes to get back in rythmn on the bike...meanwhile my buddy rode into the distance. On the final 9 miles of road-about 31 miles dirt/stone/sand, the rest paved, I started to reel him in.

He saw me coming in my orange glory and said to himself..."there's no way I'm letting the Great Pumpkin catch me" So, Great Pumpkin Racing was born! I even have a great haunted pumpkin jersey that is great for the cross season.

So, I get alot of "come on, pedal pumkin", "go get em pumpkin"-etc. I usually reply with something like thanks pookey, thanks for the kind words sunshine, etc...

Alas, Great Pumpkin Racing is no more...I'll be a Team member next year. For cross season, the only thing orange will be the bike.
Forever known as Gourd-o.
 
#33 ·
During my 1st season and second race, Cat4 men and the women's field ran together. Two laps to go and the 1st place woman is forced to pass my slow ass using a less than ideal line. Sideline heckler yells out "Mouthbreather!" and I didn't really understand. Post race I decide to educate myself and upon discovering the intended definition I was very impressed.

"Mouthbreather: Someone who is ignorant to the social courtesies of public movement. consequently, they stifle the mobility of thinking humans by becoming an obstacle which must be negotiated. they can be identified by their despondent facial expressions and wide-open mouths ."

Too true!
 
#34 ·
Your mother was a hamster and you father smelt of Elderberries.
 
#38 ·
Best CX heckle I have ever seen was a big group at a set of barriers yelling, cheering, ringing cowbells and just generally raising hell except when one particular racer came by and everyone was dead silent when he passed then immediately resume cheering as soon as he passed the barriers. It really messed with him he would look back every time wondering what was up. Of course it’s a tight nit local cycling community and everyone is pretty good friends so it was in jest.
 
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