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  1. #1
    Born from Jorts®
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    Heaven is a honky-tonk

    Ray LaMontagne -- Austin City Limits -- Heaven Is A Honky Tonk


    All my heroes have gone to heaven
    let all them saints wear flaming shoes
    the junkies and the wh*res are behind them pearly doors
    I guess I'm going to go to heaven too

    Now all my heroes have gone to heaven
    let all them righteous Joes take to shoveling coal
    the killers and the cons
    the pushers and the Johns
    with halos, wings just hovering over paths of gold

    so mama don't you cry
    when i'm dead and gone
    'cause Jesus loves his sinners
    and heaven is a honky tonk

    now all my heroes have gone to heaven
    the liars and the gamblers and the fools
    the drunkards and the thieves
    all wearing silk upon their sleeves
    and every gal is like a silver pearl in bloom

    so mama don't you cry
    when I'm dead and gone
    'cause Jesus loves his sinners
    and heaven is a honky tonk

    so mama don't you cry
    when i'm dead and gone
    'cause Jesus loves his sinners
    yes and heaven is a honky tonk
    heaven is a honky tonk
    heaven is a honky tonk

  2. #2
    Jerkhard Sirdribbledick
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    This has nothing to do with Honky Tonk, but your song reminded me of it.




    And if you needed further proof, here's Leonard Cohen lip-syncing to his own song.



    I did my best, it wasn't much
    I couldn't feel, so I tried to touch
    I've told the truth, I didn't come to fool ya
    And even though
    It all went wrong
    I'll stand before the Lord of Song
    With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah
    "He groaned when we hung the rope over the tree but was relieved to see the white pinata."
    -- Gut
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  3. #3
    Jerkhard Sirdribbledick
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    Hmmm, should I keep trying to hijack this thread or should I start a Leonard Cohen Appreciation Thread?

    While I think about it, ponder this:



    I said to hank williams: how lonely does it get?
    Hank williams hasnt answered yet
    But I hear him coughing all night long
    A hundred floors above me
    In the tower of song
    "He groaned when we hung the rope over the tree but was relieved to see the white pinata."
    -- Gut
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  4. #4
    had it in the ear before
    Reputation: gutfiddle's Avatar
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    Thats all you wanted, something special,
    Someone sacred in your life
    Just for one moment, to be warm and naked
    At my side


    you might as well have gone to Taco Bell and had a Zima while dropping a blotter and snorting Tabasco. OMFG. ~ttug

  5. #5
    Born from Jorts®
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    Quote Originally Posted by gutfiddle
    Thats all you wanted, something special,
    Someone sacred in your life
    Just for one moment, to be warm and naked
    At my side
    oh no you don't, Drunky. Go edit that **** outta my thread pronto


    (after you get back from hurling in/on the company terlet, I can wait...)

  6. #6
    Born from Jorts®
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    Quote Originally Posted by DrRoebuck
    While I think about it, ponder this:
    I like U2. that "One" song was pretty good.

  7. #7
    Jerkhard Sirdribbledick
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hollywood
    I like U2. that "One" song was pretty good.
    Was that a layered joke?
    "He groaned when we hung the rope over the tree but was relieved to see the white pinata."
    -- Gut
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  8. #8
    had it in the ear before
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hollywood
    oh no you don't, Drunky. Go edit that **** outta my thread pronto


    (after you get back from hurling in/on the company terlet, I can wait...)
    Oh Husshhh!
    Attached Images Attached Images  
    you might as well have gone to Taco Bell and had a Zima while dropping a blotter and snorting Tabasco. OMFG. ~ttug

  9. #9
    scruffy nerf herder
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    what about this...

    I Hope Heaven Has a Honky Tonk - Tracey Lawrence

    wheeeee, it must be country music day in the lounge.


    I was raised in a Christian home
    On Bible readin gospel songs
    Church doors opened up you'd see my face
    Sundays twice, Weds too, I'd take my seat on the front row pew,
    Singing Rock of Ages and Amazing Grace

    Preacher said heavens the place to go
    With pearly gates and streets of gold
    I guess for the preacher thats alright
    But I hope heavens another story
    With a good ole boy bound for glory
    A little bit like of texas on a saturday nite

    [Chorus]
    And I hope heaven has a honky tonk
    With a 5 pc band,
    Cowboy boots,and bluejeans are part of the master plan
    And I hope Hanks on the juke box, Bob Wills has a fiddle in his hand
    And I hope heaven has a honky tonk with a 5 piece band

    I hope those hardwood floors are just like glass
    The girls I ask wanna dance
    And each and every waitress is divine
    I hope that mean old bouncers got a big halo
    Those neon lights will always glow
    They ain't never heard of closing time

    [Repeat Chorus]

    I hope heaven has a honky tonk with a 5 pc band
    so sayeth the funk....

    Chris

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
    "The RBR Lounge. You won't ever find a more wretched hive of scum and villany. We must be cautious."

  10. #10
    had it in the ear before
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    Quote Originally Posted by funknuggets
    I Hope Heaven Has a Honky Tonk - Tracey Lawrence

    wheeeee, it must be country music day in the lounge.
    have u heard this tear jerker by Tracey??

    We went out for beers and a couple laughs
    Knowing full well that every bad joke that Jimmy told, might be his last
    So we laughed like the world wasn't at war
    Said things to him we'd never said before
    And he teared up as he held up his glass
    He said, boys if i dont make it back-

    Have a beer for me
    Don't waste no tears on me
    On Friday night sit on the visitors side and cheer for the home team
    Drive my camaro
    90 miles an hour down red rock road
    with born to run blasting on the radio
    And find someone good enough for Amy,
    who will love her like I would have
    If I don't make it back

    We said hey man now that ain't gonna happen,
    don't even think like that
    We know you, you'll pull through without a scratch
    He pulled me aside in the parking lot,
    said Amy and me we're gonna tie the knot,
    you're my best man, just wanted you to know that
    Just in case I don't make it back

    Have a beer for me
    Don't waste no tears on me
    On Friday night sit on the visitors side and cheer for the home team
    Drive my camaro
    90 miles an hour down red rock road
    with born to run blasting on the radio
    And find someone good enough for Amy,
    who will love her like I would have
    If I don't make it back

    If the good Lord calls me home I'd like to think my friends will think about me when i'm gone
    Well Miller Light ain't my brand,
    but I drink one every now and then in his honor
    And we ain't missed a home game yet
    Had that camaro at 110 on red rock road when the speakers blow
    And I introduced Amy to a friend of mine from Monroe,
    he's a good old boy
    But you know, she just ain't ready
    you might as well have gone to Taco Bell and had a Zima while dropping a blotter and snorting Tabasco. OMFG. ~ttug

  11. #11
    Sticky Valentine
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    joe
    'They say gold paint on the palace gates comes from the teeth of pensioners
    They're so tired of shooting protest singers that they hardly mention us
    While fountains fill with second-hand perfume and sodden trading stamps
    They'll hang the bullies and the louts that dampen down the day" - EC

  12. #12
    In need of sock puppet
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    What genre is this?


  13. #13
    Sticky Valentine
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    Ah, yes. Well, this happens to be a nocturne.

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=LSXyu7h7nyw


    joe
    'They say gold paint on the palace gates comes from the teeth of pensioners
    They're so tired of shooting protest singers that they hardly mention us
    While fountains fill with second-hand perfume and sodden trading stamps
    They'll hang the bullies and the louts that dampen down the day" - EC

  14. #14
    In need of sock puppet
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    Quote Originally Posted by JoeDaddio
    Ah, yes. Well, this happens to be a nocturne.

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=LSXyu7h7nyw


    joe

    Okay, so if that's a nocturne, what's this?

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=eBGIQ7ZuuiU

  15. #15
    Sticky Valentine
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    Quote Originally Posted by thinkcooper
    Okay, so if that's a nocturne, what's this?

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=eBGIQ7ZuuiU

    Damn you!


    joe
    'They say gold paint on the palace gates comes from the teeth of pensioners
    They're so tired of shooting protest singers that they hardly mention us
    While fountains fill with second-hand perfume and sodden trading stamps
    They'll hang the bullies and the louts that dampen down the day" - EC

  16. #16
    had it in the ear before
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    Quote Originally Posted by thinkcooper
    Okay, so if that's a nocturne, what's this?

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=eBGIQ7ZuuiU
    jesus ****ing christ in a chicken basket
    you might as well have gone to Taco Bell and had a Zima while dropping a blotter and snorting Tabasco. OMFG. ~ttug

  17. #17
    Born from Jorts®
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    Quote Originally Posted by thinkcooper
    Okay, so if that's a nocturne, what's this?

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=eBGIQ7ZuuiU
    how did love so right, turn out to be so wrong?

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