Lownje Shorts - NNC wisdom Lownje Style - Page 7
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  1. #151
    What the what???
    Reputation: Opus51569's Avatar
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    78.) But, Opus, I want to ride with my friend. How do I maintain "social distance"? Behold! The Social Distandem



    https://www.bikeradar.com/news/social-distandem/

    From the makers of the: Bi-curious-cycle, the Helocipede and the You-Me Cycle...
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    Given his penchant for nicknames, and his aversion to reading, I've decided to shorten Donald J. Trump to it's essence: Dump*

    I was "social distancing" before it was cool.

  2. #152
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    79.) Are you like me? Wait. Of course not. If you were like me you'd be writing this so you wouldn't even need to ask such a dumb question. But, I digress...

    Sick of using earbuds only to have them fall out of your ears at an inopportune moment? Well, worry no more. I have invented an ingenious device for holding your earbuds securely in place:



    Since it goes over your head, I'm thinking of calling them...

    Headphones
    TM.

    Venture capitalists who would like to get in on the ground floor of this exciting new business opportunity can PM me.
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    Given his penchant for nicknames, and his aversion to reading, I've decided to shorten Donald J. Trump to it's essence: Dump*

    I was "social distancing" before it was cool.

  3. #153
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    80.) It occurs to me as I gaze upon my vast stable of noble steeds that they each fulfill a niche similar to vehicles of the motorized variety:

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    Given his penchant for nicknames, and his aversion to reading, I've decided to shorten Donald J. Trump to it's essence: Dump*

    I was "social distancing" before it was cool.

  4. #154
    Banned forever.....or not
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    81....Never let the people you are riding with, see you take a drink.....When they ask about it, tell them that water is for sissies.
    If your opinion differs from mine, ..........Too bad.
    .
    How would you like it if Hitler killed you
    Dogbert.

    I>U

    Buying parts to hang on your bike is always easier than getting fit.

    If you feel wimpy and weak, get out and train more, ya wee lassie!

    If Jesus had a gun, he'd be alive today!

  5. #155
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    Quote Originally Posted by MR_GRUMPY View Post
    81....Never let the people you are riding with, see you take a drink.....When they ask about it, tell them that water is for sissies.
    Water is weight... ride dry bastards!
    Given his penchant for nicknames, and his aversion to reading, I've decided to shorten Donald J. Trump to it's essence: Dump*

    I was "social distancing" before it was cool.

  6. #156
    Schuylkill Trail Bum
    Reputation: SPlKE's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MR_GRUMPY View Post
    81....Never let the people you are riding with, see you take a drink.....When they ask about it, tell them that water is for sissies.
    81a. Never pee during or for at least an hour after a ride, no matter how long the ride is. If you do, you have had too much water. Ya big thirsty sissy.

  7. #157
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    82.) It's not all about bikes around here. For those who wonder if it can still be called cycling if you don't have to turn the pedals... imagine how golfers are going to feel about golfing if you don't have to swing a club...



    https://www.sportbible.com/golf/reac...yards-20200601

    Why not just put a golf ball in a potato gun and shoot it down the fairway???
    Given his penchant for nicknames, and his aversion to reading, I've decided to shorten Donald J. Trump to it's essence: Dump*

    I was "social distancing" before it was cool.

  8. #158
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    83.) The life cycle...

    a. I sit in my chair and watch cycling on TV.
    b. I get bored with just watching cycling and buy a bike.
    c. It's kinda scary riding out there in the world, so I buy a trainer.
    d. Riding the trainer is boring, so I get some video apps to watch while I ride.
    e. This training stuff isn't fun, it's hard work, so I get a motorized bike to assist.
    f. I sit in my "chair" and watch cycling on "TV"...
    Given his penchant for nicknames, and his aversion to reading, I've decided to shorten Donald J. Trump to it's essence: Dump*

    I was "social distancing" before it was cool.

  9. #159
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    84.) I'm at an age where I welcome innovation... not because I'm enamored with the next new thing, but because I know the perfectly serviceable "old" thing will now be at least 20% off...
    Given his penchant for nicknames, and his aversion to reading, I've decided to shorten Donald J. Trump to it's essence: Dump*

    I was "social distancing" before it was cool.

  10. #160
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    85.) “Seat’s not level,” you say??? Maybe you need one of these...





    Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
    Given his penchant for nicknames, and his aversion to reading, I've decided to shorten Donald J. Trump to it's essence: Dump*

    I was "social distancing" before it was cool.

  11. #161
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    86.) With the recent spike in interest in cycling, thefts are also on the rise. Sure, you could buy a bunch of expensive locks and sensors and doo-dads... or you could just stop by your local Army Surplus store.




    Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
    Given his penchant for nicknames, and his aversion to reading, I've decided to shorten Donald J. Trump to it's essence: Dump*

    I was "social distancing" before it was cool.

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