POL: how on 3arth will teh BenWA shed last year'z farmers tan by the summer?

View Poll Results: somebody hYelp meh!

Voters
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  • Scrub the bajeezus with a loofah

    1 5.00%
  • Sand paper, coarse grit

    4 20.00%
  • A grada, a cheeeese grada.

    5 25.00%
  • Arm warmers under teh tanning light

    6 30.00%
  • Paint up the dark parts with white paint

    3 15.00%
  • Other...specify por favor?

    1 5.00%
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  1. #1
    It's all ball bearings
    Reputation: BenWA's Avatar
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    Red face POL: how on 3arth will teh BenWA shed last year'z farmers tan by the summer?

    Okay, it's now the middle of Feb and my farmer's tan from last summer hasn't budged. And it's not like we get any sun here in winter to perpetuate a farmers tan. Will I EVER get rid of this god blasted thing??

    All started on that fateful day, 6/27/06:
    Ouch:


    Today, 2/10/07:


    So what's the recommended method to get rid of a farmers tan?

    A) Frequent exfoliating with a loofah?



    B) A sanding block with 80 grit?



    C) Cheese grater?



    D) Strategic artificial tanning?



    E) Paint?




    WhatshouldIdo foolz???

    Last edited by BenWA; 02-10-2007 at 11:28 PM.

  2. #2

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    holy fark! i haven't laffed so hard in my life!! LOLZ!1eleven!

  3. #3
    the fist
    Reputation: JohnHenry's Avatar
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    Never. Gonna. Happen. By the way you're a total moreon.
    Will you date me and Edge?
    FlexiSexual

  4. #4

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    lol


    HTH!

  5. #5
    Rep *****.
    Reputation: firstrax's Avatar
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    Au Courant sunless tanning. The only one that looks real.

    BTW, your going to become photoshop fodder.

  6. #6
    the fist
    Reputation: JohnHenry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by firstrax
    Au Courant sunless tanning. The only one that looks real.

    BTW, your going to become photoshop fodder.
    Work your magic, Magic Maker.
    FlexiSexual

  7. #7
    Rep *****.
    Reputation: firstrax's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by teh moreon
    Work your magic, Magic Maker.
    Just gettin warmed up.
    Last edited by firstrax; 06-05-2007 at 09:42 AM.

  8. #8
    the fist
    Reputation: JohnHenry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by firstrax
    Just gettin warmed up.
    Oh Snap!
    You live in my heart.
    FlexiSexual

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by firstrax
    Just gettin warmed up.

    yee-ee-ikes!

  10. #10
    Strained coccyx etc etc
    Reputation: haiku d'etat's Avatar
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    Exclamation

    THIS BE THE POST OF TEH YEAR.

    NO OTHERS.

    ETC!!!!!!!!!!!
    One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know.

  11. #11

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    agreed.

  12. #12
    Sticky Valentine
    Reputation: JoeDaddio's Avatar
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    Sparkling orange mineral water has just been shot up into my sinuses... thanks!




    joe
    'They say gold paint on the palace gates comes from the teeth of pensioners
    They're so tired of shooting protest singers that they hardly mention us
    While fountains fill with second-hand perfume and sodden trading stamps
    They'll hang the bullies and the louts that dampen down the day" - EC

  13. #13
    It's all ball bearings
    Reputation: BenWA's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by firstrax
    Just gettin warmed up.
    oh dear lord!

    I'll never be able to watch a Jack Nicholson film again now, thanx firstrax.

  14. #14
    It's all ball bearings
    Reputation: BenWA's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by firstrax
    Just gettin warmed up.
    p.s, i cant stop laughing at that, even tho i'm the one who got pwnz0rd

  15. #15
    Non Non Cyclist
    Reputation: CyreneSong's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BenWA
    oh dear lord!

    I'll never be able to watch a Jack Nicholson film again now, thanx firstrax.
    That's not Jack. It's BikerFox!

    PS I'm offended by the blatant nipples in your post.
    Move along...nothing to see here.

  16. #16
    It's all ball bearings
    Reputation: BenWA's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lets_ride
    That's not Jack. It's BikerFox!
    oh.


  17. #17
    RoadBikeReview Member
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    The fact you have tan lines makes wonder how close you are to Longview, there maybe some lingering effects form the nuclear cooling tower that was imploded last spring.

    Down here in the beaver state (try working that into a conversation) I havenít seen the orange thingy in the sky since november.

  18. #18
    here comes trouble
    Reputation: paint's Avatar
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    I voted paint up the dark parts... because it has my name in it.
    Man never made any material as resilient as the human spirit. -Bernard Williams

  19. #19

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    congratulations, all teh chicks on this forum is now hot for U, and all the guys is having nttawwt thoughts about you. 'cept me .... I'm gonna change my name to Straight Biker On Jesus and pick up where Kerry Irons left off.

    BTW thanks for the nipples, teh Mods will now be watching you more closely

    moreon
    "I'm so postmodern ... " Spirito

  20. #20
    It's all ball bearings
    Reputation: BenWA's Avatar
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    Exclamation

    Quote Originally Posted by Gay Biker On Acid
    congratulations, all teh chicks on this forum is now hot for U, and all the guys is having nttawwt thoughts about you. 'cept me ....
    I think I'm gonna have to go into hide out mode for a while and come back with a new identity to avert teh stalkers. all tihs talk has got me skeeeerd, it never occurred to me that my nipples would be the subject of such scrutiny

  21. #21
    Call me a Fred
    Reputation: MikeBiker's Avatar
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    Ben, You're looking pretty cute there. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge!
    Mike

    -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    You may starch my jumper
    Hang it upside your wall
    You know by that, baby
    I need my ashes hauled.

    Sleepy John Estes

    H

  22. #22
    It's all ball bearings
    Reputation: BenWA's Avatar
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    my foto host site is teh suxxorest

  23. #23
    It's all ball bearings
    Reputation: BenWA's Avatar
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    Srsly U Guys

    all joking aside, is there any way to get rid of this damned thing?

    //At the rate I'm going i'm still gonna have it in summer of 2009

  24. #24
    the fist
    Reputation: JohnHenry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BenWA
    all joking aside, is there any way to get rid of this damned thing?

    //At the rate I'm going i'm still gonna have it in summer of 2009

    HAH! Wear sleeveless jerseys.
    LOLZ!
    +1 triatheleteazillion
    FlexiSexual

  25. #25
    It's all ball bearings
    Reputation: BenWA's Avatar
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    yeah, i'll try that

    thx asshat

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